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IF.

If you can approach a 17 stone lock forward, And say, "I think that ball belongs to me", Though he has shown by both word and gesture, Dissimilar views on where that ball should be. ~ If you can demonstrate to your opposing number, In bar beery friendship after the game, That his left boot has a stud missing, As the pattern on your back is just the same. ~ If you can doubt the ref's parentage, And disguise it as a cough, Or attribute the words to their captain, And, better still, get him sent off. Gratuitous action shot

If once again you see your physio, With magic black bag in hand, And he makes you count each of his fingers, As, with crowd clapping, he helps you stand. ~ If you can force your heart, nerve and sinew, To serve your turn long after they are gone, And so hold on when there is nothing in you, Except the will which says to them: "Hold on!" ~ If you can fill all of eighty minutes, With sixty seconds worth of distance run, Yours is the earth and everything that's in it, And - which is more - you're a Rugby player, my son! ~ last home